I'm quietly passing 80 posts with this one. Gosh.

I subscribe to Sahara Rose's newsletter and she sent one out today that I thought was very timely[1] (haha).

How can we enjoy the present without giving up our radical pursuit of a better future? [...] It’s knowing that we are enough but still striving to become a better version of us.

The whole thing is very good, I just picked out two lines that particularly struck me. Her text doesn't provide answers, exactly, but gives you some ideas to explore your own solutions. This is a difficult concept to come to terms with. Mindfulness, self-care, slow living... All those sound nice, but then we take a look at our long to-do lists, all the goals we have and things we have to accomplish before we're 40. There's so much! How can I take a day off without feeling terribly guilty? I'm not quite there yet, but at least I'm trying to strike that balance. Progress is a process. What works for me might not be the answer for everyone.

Earlier today after reading another Twitter thread about someone sharing their story of a scary social situation they were in, I was inspired to share my own story from a few years ago. It's something that's still burned into my memory except that I have horrible facial memory so now the guy just looks like a buff version of Larry the Cable Guy in my head. (never ever call me in as a witness in a murder trial, I will most certainly give you the wrong person) It was a relief to have my feelings and experience validated. Certainly not everyone gets to have that.

I don't know if this sort of experience will ever truly go away. It's a fact that most men are bigger and physically stronger than women, so there will always be a power imbalance. Power imbalances perpetuate violence in order to maintain that power. It's a sad fact of life. And the people who need most to learn from my story, to learn from their actions...they're not the ones on Twitter reading and getting educated. So if my story of my experience makes other women feel like they're not alone, that they're not irrational or paranoid...that's enough for me. We need to stick together in this terrifying world.

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In other, happier news, Kiyohito's route (from Kings of Paradise) came out on Love 365 and I played it right away last night. It's so good! He's so cute and he and the heroine are so cute together!! It was fun since it was completely different from the other route for the same game. They spent a lot of time talking about nutrition and skincare. He was having her wash her face with the lather—without allowing her hands to touch her face? How does that even work? Is Japanese facewash so different from the stuff I'm using now? So many questions... I'll talk about the route in a full post later but I highly recommend it. I'm going to play through it again for sure.

I'm finally off tomorrow! I've got Zumba in the morning so I can't sleep in, but I'm looking forward to having some much-needed me time. I do want to write, though, since I won't be able to later in the week. I've got lots of cleaning to do, too... It will be tricky to balance, but I think it's worth doing.


  1. It's mirrored on her blog here. ↩︎